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  • Trump Staffers Get Rude Awakening After Work History Comes Back To Bite Them In The A**

    Donald Trump, News, Politics

    As it happens, if you work for the Trump administration, your chances of getting laid are pretty slim.

    Washington DC, like New York City, isn’t too fond of the toxic president* and his colleagues. Staffers who live in DC aren’t having a good time because the area is hostile to this White House and its appalling policies. Washington DC is diverse and inclusive so Trump’s racially charged campaign didn’t go down well with the residents. Trump staffers are very sad right now after finding out that they aren’t very popular in the U.S. capital.


    Politico spoke with more than 30 millennial staffers from the Trump White House and across the administration, some of them current and others who were previously with the administration. The staffers said they have been heckled on the streets and spoke of how they struggle to get a date.

    “Instead of folks looking outward,” one young White House aide said, adding, “more folks look inward.”

    Wow, so women actually care about the substance of a man, instead of whether his hair is perfect? Who knew (besides all of us)?

    It’s so bad that staffers have avoided the heart of the capital. They have avoided living in the more ritzy areas and are at times dining in no-frills sports bars. There is even a “closet Trump bar” in town that they frequent. Outside, on the streets, it’s not any better.

    “I have gotten yelled at a few times walking out of work,” one White House staffer said. “I want to get home, not get in a debate in the middle of Pennsylvania Avenue.”

    Sometimes, they find it easier to hide their identities. “I’ll just say I work for the federal government,” said one White House aide.

    One former staffer tries to distance himself from his old job. “Even now, people have to ask five or six times before I say, ‘Yeah, I worked there,’” he said. Some staffers just straight up lie. “I told people I was an auditor down on Wall Street, and people just stopped asking me questions after that,” one former aide recalled.

    Dating sites aren’t much better.

    When it comes to disclosing their affiliation with Trump, no ground is more fraught than courtship. “Trump supporters swipe left”—meaning “don’t even bother trying”—might be the single most common disclaimer on dating app profiles in Washington.

    It’s no better for women, either. A 31-year-old female administration official told of her “very, very frequent” scraps with her matches on dating sites. “You do the small talk thing, and you have a very good conversation, and then they might say, ‘You didn’t vote for Trump, right?’” she said. “As soon as I say, ‘Of course I did,’ it just devolves into all-caps ‘HOW COULD YOU BE SUCH A RACIST AND A BIGOT?’ And ‘You’re going to take away your own birth control.’” One man asked her, “Do you rip babies from their mothers and then send them to Mexico?”

    “I literally got the other day, ‘Thanks but no thanks. Just Googled you and it said you were a mouthpiece for the Trump administration. Go fuck yourself,’” the official said. “I’m no longer on Bumble.”

    Well, that’s just sad — and lonely. When a conservative calls me a ‘lib’ in an attempt to disparage me, I always say that “calling me a liberal is like telling me I’m pretty.” Obviously, the same can’t be said for Trump staffers. Because saying you’re a Trump supporter doesn’t bring about a sexy image of a man or woman in anyone’s mind. It brings about images of Nazis holding Tiki Torches while wearing MAGA hats.

    Own it, Trumpsters, because this will haunt you forever.

    Featured image via Tom Lohdan/Flickr


    Conover Kennard

    Conover makes tea partiers cry as a hobby. She was Commander of Jade Helm15 during the failed takeover of the South. She's also one of the biggest arseholes on Twitter. At night, she can be found drinking Conservative tears while pulling off the wings of flies just because she can. She is the founder of a Marxist, Commie, Maoist, Socialist site and has contributed to several other sites, blah blah blah. She is an awful person but she doesn't like to brag about that.